Depression sucks ass! I have dealt with depression since I was 14. A couple of weeks ago we have decided to have another baby and I don't want to be on my medication while I'm pregnant. Well that has not been going so well. So starting the medication back up until I hear from my mid-wife about what I should do. Maybe I will get lucky and the one that I'm taking now is safe to take during pregnancy, if not then I will change to one that is safe and try through out the whole pregnancy to wean off of it.
As for right now it's just not an option. I'm so short with the kids again, sleeping way more, not wanting to do anything, or go anywhere. These are all very bad things. I have caught myself sooner then before. When we first moved I was getting up at 7-7:30am everyday, and that felt great to get up early have a little time to myself before the kids woke up. Now I find myself sleeping in as late at 10am some mornings. (most of the time the kids are still sleeping, or over at the grandparents house). I hate sleeping the day away. I hate the way that I'm feeling right now. So this must stop and must stop now!
So I'm taking my depression back until my control. I will not let it run my life anymore like it has for the last few weeks. Slowly creeping back up and trying to take control. Not anymore, I'm back and I'm in control. This is my life and I'm going to live it my way.
I know that with a lot of prayer, hard work, the right combination of medications, and support from my wonderful family I will win this battle once again.
